it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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