Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
