Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
