HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize