If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Are we still banned from the library?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
