spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize