so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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