We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
