It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
