yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
