Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
