You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
