New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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