And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Randomize
