It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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