Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
