there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
