can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
