there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
