6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
