Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
