dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize