I CAN MOONWALK!
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
