You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
