can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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