Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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