Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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