you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I cockslap morals
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
