It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
