Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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