I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
