Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize