fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
