6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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