you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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