weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize