i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
soo... how was my night?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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