He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
