We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize