Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
