I wanna bring you to show and tell
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
