she looked like the bat from fern gully.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
