I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize