I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize