i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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