I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
