We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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