i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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