hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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