Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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