it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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