you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
